![]() ![]() ![]() President” in a screechier and scarier direction. But it does seem as if she might be asking herself “What would Ella sing?,” even though her stylization ultimately seems less Fitzgerald-ian than like Marilyn Monroe suddenly taking “Happy Birthday, Mr. ![]() This is, admittedly, the most outlandish of all the theories presented here. Perhaps Fergie believes she is a straight-up, legit jazz singer. If it’d been successful, that would have been the perfect moment for the pro-kneelers to rush in with a “Gotcha!” Admittedly, Fergie has not appeared to be all that radical in her politics until now, but that’s the very nature of sleeper cells. You could imagine progressives and conservatives united in taking an involuntarily supplicating, “Please make it stop” position. Maybe it was part of a leftist conspiracy to make the nation take a knee. Fergie’s current hairstyle is somewhere between a Jennifer and a Barbra, but there was much about her manner that made it seem as if she were actually doing some sort of implicit homage to Michelle Pfeiffer’s rendering of “Makin’ Whoopie” in “The Fabulous Baker Boys.” If she had crawled onto a piano about the time she got to the twilight’s last gleaming, it would have made a lot more sense. Yet it played out for laughs watch the video and see the players increasingly struggle with whether to smile or not, before finally Jimmy Kimmel gives the wide grin everyone has been waiting for.īut what was she thinking? A few theories come to mind (although, to be honest, none of them could really fully account for what basketball fans witnessed Sunday): (Your gold medal will always be safe, Roseanne Barr.) Or maybe we shouldn’t be quick to assume that her intent was serious, but there is little in Fergie’s past oeuvre to suggest that the kind of waggish impulses that would lead someone to deliberately do a sexy sendup of a nation’s most sacred ballad. It wasn’t the worst televised national anthem ever - maybe just the worst not to actually be intended as comedy. Was there collusion, or was this unilaterally sprung upon an unsuspecting America by an outside enemy bent on sowing discord and chaos? We’re speaking of course, of the scandal of Fergie’s Sunday night performance of the national anthem, which caused the entire All Star Game-watching public to immediately form a social-media grand jury, intent on wondering: What the NBA and TNT know, and when did they know it? ![]()
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